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Intro G7 C F7 G F C
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I'm that first-person they talk about in all the books
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I'm that perspective you can not doubt, see how I look
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Control the narrative reliably, baby, it's all about me
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And I wrote the book about throwing the book at those who don't do it by it
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So now I'm holding myself hostage, Stockholm lust just looks like justice
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And enough lefts don't make the right but two wrongs do, oh man, Sun Tzu would
Love this
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Beating my dead high horse off the high road to low ground
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'Cause if you shake your fists at snakes in grass it looks like punching down!
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So God forbid I'm seen just as an average human being
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I mean, imagine if protagonists just died in the first scene
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I'm the gap between a tragedy and comedy
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Don't come at me, I'm the main character and you have to like me
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I loot plot armor from NPC's, well, they are to me
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Trite, tropes, traits, traumas, trinkets, and treats; it's all XP
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Look in the sky, it's a bird! It's a plane! No, it's super-ego! The underdog
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You cheer for
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Villains are everywhere, that's how I know that I'm the hero
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So tie me to the train tracks, laugh and snidely twist your mustache
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Snidely Whiplash, Boris Badinov, ignorin' me's bad enough
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Where do you get off? Da, dasvidaniya, darling, Daleks in high collars
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Monologue and I outsmart them with a ray-gun and a tweet
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So God forbid I'm seen just as an average human being
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I mean, imagine if protagonists just died in the first scene
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I'm the gap between a tragedy and comedy
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Don't come at me, I'm the main character and you have to like me
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Judge me by what my cover shows, author becomes beyond reproach
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You don't know the prose, or if the spine is still intact
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Oh, like Alice fell to wonderland come Astroturf my Overton
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And bolden my demand to live by alternative facts
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Her majesty says (the royal we demand a standard of loyalty
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An agreement to be reverent, lick the emperor's new boots)
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The court fool got the guillotine, the witches the stake, you the dopamine
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And Siemens made the Zyklon B but we all still get the flu
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We all do what we need to to get through (It's nothing new)
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But I ain't done one fucking thing to you!
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So God forbid I'm seen just as an average human being
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I mean, imagine if protagonists just died in the first scene
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I'm the gap between a tragedy and comedy
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Don't come at me, I'm the main character and you have to like me