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Bb F
Life is like an ocean voyage and our bodies are the ships
C A Dm Dm/C
And without a moral compass we would all be cast adrift
Bb F
So to keep us on our bearings, the Lord gave us a gift
C7 C
And like most gifts you get, it was a book
F Bb
I only read one book, but it's a good book, don't you know
C7 F
I act the way I act because the Good Book tells me so
F F7/Eb Bb/D Bbm/D
If I wanna known how to be good, it's to the Good Book that I go
C7 F
'Cos the Good Book is a book and it is good and it's a book
F Bb
I know the Good Book's good because the Good Book says it's good
C7 F
I know the Good Book knows it's good because a really good book would
F F7 Bb Bbm
You wouldn't cook without a cookbook and I think it's understood
C7 F
You can't be good without a Good Book 'cos it's good and it's a book
And it is good for cookin'
Dm A
I tried to read some other books, but I soon gave up on that
Bb F C
The paragraphs ain't numbered and they complicate the facts
A Dm
I can't read Harry Potter 'cos they're worshipping false gods and that
G C
And Dumbledore's a poofter and that's bad, 'cos it's not good
Dm A
Morality is written there in simple white and black
Bb F C
I feel sorry for you heathens, got to think about all that
A Dm
Good is good and evil's bad and goats are good and pigs are crap
Bb F
You'll find which one is which in the Good Book, 'cos it's good
And it's a book, and it's a book
Dm A
I had a cat, she gave birth to a litter
Bb F C
The kittens were adorable and they made my family laugh
A Dm
But as they grew they started misbehavin'
G C
So I drowned the little fuckers in the bath
A Dm
When the creatures in your care start being menaces
G C
The answers can be found right there in Genesis!
C7
Genesis, Chapter 6, Verse 5-7!
G
Swing your partner by the hand
C
Have a baby if you can
D
But if the voices your head
Say to sacrifice your kid
G
To satiate your loving God's
C
Fetish for dead baby blood
D
It's simple faith, the Book demands
So raise that knife up in your hand!
F Bb
Before the Good Book made us good, there was no good way to know
C F
If a thing was good or not that good or kind of touch and go
F F7 Bb Bbm
So God decided he'd give writing allegoric prose a go
C7 F
And so he wrote a book and it was generally well-received
Bb F C
The Telegraph said, 'This God is reminiscent of the Norse.'
Bb F C
The Times said, 'Kind of turgid, but I liked the bit with horses.'
A Dm
The Mail said, 'Lots of massacres, a violent tour de force
G C
If you only read one book this year, then this one is a book
D
And it is good, and it's a book!'
G
Swing your daughter by the hand
C
But if she gets raped by a man
D
And refuses then to marry him
Stone her to death!
Em B
If you just close your eyes and block your ears
C G D
To the accumulated knowledge of the last two thousand years
B Em
Then morally, guess what? You're off the hook
A D
And thank Christ you only have to read one book
Dm
Just because the book's contents
A
Were written generations hence
Dm
By hairy desert-dwelling gents
A
Squatting in their dusty tents
Em
Just because what Heaven said
B
Was said before they'd leavened bread
Em
Just 'cos Jesus couldn't read
B
Doesn't mean that we should need
C
When manipulating human genes
G
To alleviate pain and fight disease
C
When deciding whether it's wrong or right
G
To help the dyin' let go of life
D
Or stop a pregnancy when it's
Just a tiny blastocyst
B Em
There's no reason why we should take a look
D C
At any other book
G/B
But the Good Book
A
'Cause it's good
And it's a book
D
And it's a book
And it's quite good!
G G7/F
Good is good and evil's bad
C/E Cm/E
And kids get killed when God gets mad
D G D G
And you'd better take a good look
Written by Tim Minchin