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Intro: C#
Verse
F# Bb
Childhood is precious,
B F#
but if we knew the whole truth then,
B Bb Eb
it would make our memories dark,
Ab C# F#
so here's your, childhood, ruined.
F# B F#
The Little Mermaid movie poster featured dicks, not a lie.
B F#
And the original story of the Mermaid ended
Ab C#
When the Little Mermaid died.
F#
The Land Before Time was awesome,
B F#
Ducky's voice was a little girl's 'quack'.
B Bb Eb
Her real dad murdered her in cold blood,
Ab C# F#
That's why Ducky's voice did not come back.
F# B Eb C#
Childhood ruined, childhood ruined, the truth is out there, and the truth is wow.
F# B Eb C# F#
Childhood ruined, childhood ruined, if it wasn't ruined before, its ruined now!
F#
'How about writers?'
Verse
F# B F#
the author of Peter Pan kept a book up on the shelf.
B F# Ab C#
He forged a will to get custody of kids then Peter killed himself.
F# B F#
The guy who wrote James and the Giant Peach really hated the Jews,
B Bb Eb Ab C# F#
And Lewis Carroll of Wonderland was a pedophile too.
Eb B C#
The writer of the Giving Tree was a poetry machine,
Eb
His children's poems were so pornographic,
B C#
They were first published in Playboy Magazine.
F# B Eb C#
Childhood ruined, childhood ruined, sorry to sacrifice your sacred cow.
F# B Eb C# F#
Childhood ruined, childhood ruined, if it wasn't ruined before, its ruined now!
Bridge
Eb
E.T. wasn't always a puppet,
B C#
He was played by a kid born with no legs.
Eb
During Milo and Otis, tons of dogs died,
B C#
But sometimes you've gotta break a couple eggs.
F# B Eb C#
Childhood ruined, childhood ruined, no more 'barks', no more 'meows'.
F# B Eb C# F#
Childhood ruined, childhood ruined, if it wasn't ruined before, its ruined now.
Bridge
Eb
So when it comes down to the truth,
B C#
Sometimes you must just surrender,
Eb B C#
The principal from Ferris Bueller is a registered sex offender...
Outro
F#
More child stars overdose,
B F#
Than time in this song will allow,
B Bb Eb
And so I have to ask you:
Ab C# F#
'Is your childhood ruined now?'