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Well I used to be a Democrat, a liberal no doubt,
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I didn't think conservatives knew what life's about
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Then I started leaving the Fox News Channel on
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If that's the face of the right, I'll tell the left so long.
Oh, I want a girl like the girls on Fox News,
Everyone is beautiful any one you choose
Whoever does the hiring knows how to light my fuse
Oh, I want a girl like the girls on Fox News,
There's Gretchen, Megan and Martha, Harris and Patty Ann
Janis, Jenny, Julie, Maria, Anna and Alison
Dana, Anisley, Andrea, Uma, Shannon, Molly and Heather
They Make the bad news on TV look a whole lot better
Now please don't call me shallow, a pervert or insane
Who the heck does not love beauty with brains
I'll bet you that Bill Clinton, when Hillary walks in
Quickly switches back from Fox to MSBNN
Chorus, with Bill wants a girl....
Now to Doocey, Killmeade and Bolling, Bret, Shep and Shawn
And all those other hairy legged Geraldos you put on
I ask you all one question, who would you rather watch
Cavato or Courtey Friel interview Ed Koch?
Cause honey sure beats vinegar to wash down the news we need
Well no one else comes close except for maybe Robin Meade
They got you blondes and brunettes, even redheads too
Which proves that they're the only ones with fair and balanced news
Play Modified Chorus:
Oh, I want a girl like the girls on Fox News,
I'd sit there for an hour in Billy Hemmers shoes
Can't help it if other network girls egos get bruised
Oh, I want a girl like the girls on Fox News,
And I like Michele Malkin, she never makes my red state blue
And if my wife would let me, hey I'd marry Michelle too
Save some love for Gretta she's the smartest of you'all
And when she's off the record, she's the wildest of them all
Now I'm a Fox News junkie, I watch it all I can
My liberal days are over, hope Bob Beckle understands
And I believe that everything O'Riley has to say
Especially when he has Kiberly Guilfoile on that day